BREAKING NEWS: Actor/Comedian Sinbad Misses Ninth Straight Tae-bo Workout

Acclaimed actor/comedian Sinbad was again missing today from his weekly Taebo exercise class at the Los Angeles fitness center on Santa Monica Boulevard making this the ninth straight absence to date for the star of such films as “Jingle All the Way,” “Goodburger,” and “The Cherokee Kid” and resigning many to the possibility that he will never show for another workout class again.

The Taebo instructor and his class have long since stopped delaying their warm up stretches for the arrival of the popular comedian and star of “The Cherokee Kid” and are unsure if he will show up for any more sessions during the Spring quarter.

“Well he is signed up for the rest of the month and he’s already paid dues in full. He might show up. I don’t know,” commented twenty-six year old class instructor Mark Hamish.

A press release from Sinbad’s publicist would only specify that the comedian was in Cyprus hosting the Miss Universe pageant and would be taking a short vacation before beginning work on his sixth annual Soul Music Festival in the island of the Bahamas. We caught up with Sinbad’s publicist for more explanation.

Sinbad’s publicist Mark Gardeky: “He’s been stuck with a full plate over the last several months and just hasn’t had the time to attend any Taebo workouts. There have been many occasions when he has had the misfortune of leaving for the gym while forgetting a bar of soap or change in underwear and Mr. Sinbad understandably prefers not to participate in a gym workout if his hygiene and shower needs are not met. He has very high standards in that regard. Still other times he’s had too light a lunch which can get in the way of a proper workout.” Other reasons cited by Mr. Gardeky for the comedic impresario’s many absences included him “getting the days mixed up” and “feeling sluggish.”

Sinbad captured the nation’s attention several years ago with his portrayal in an infomercial as a successful celebrity endorser deeply committed to the Billy Blanks aerobic workout:

“…if Taebo is for me, then it’s for everybody,” being one of his lines from the very popular 1998-advertisement campaign where he also popularized the man’s dangling feather earring.

Brenda Maloney a housewife from Anaheim and Taebo loyalist was not at all surprised by the news of Sinbad’s latest stunt and even viewed the recent events as an expected turn.

“Sinbad so crazy! I mean that boy is crazy! He stupid!”

Others like forty-two year old receptionist Ruth Watkins are distressed by the star of “Cherokee Kids” continued absence and wish Sinbad would give an explanation as to why he has not been doing the workout routine and has gained a reported eleven pounds since the filming of the infomercial.

“He ain’t doing it? I spent $70 bucks on four tapes when I saw that Sinbad trusted the product. Why ain’t he doing it? I thought he did it!”

Indeed the point articulated by Ms. Watkins has been picked up on by an increasing number of loyal fans. Many have speculated in recent weeks that the famous comedian known for his false bravado and broad colored pants had been neglecting his workout routine in favor of an all shake diet and frequent visits to an astrologist.

Brian Willis one-time childhood friend and former manager to the former host of VIBE and star of “The Cherokee Kid” acknowledged to an E! News correspondent today that Sinbad never enjoyed the workout as much as he let on in the Taebo ads. “I think it was fun at first and they paid him decent money to appear in the commercial but we all pretty much knew his heart was never really into it.”

Other celebrity endorsers like Carmen Electra, Mackenzie Phillips, and Shaquille O’Neal have opted for different or more progressive exercises to stay fit but, by all accounts, Sinbad has not adopted or endorsed any other workout routine. Taebo founder Billy Blanks has been unreachable for comment but close sources reveal an indifferent reaction from the workout king about the absence of his reported good friend. “I mean, it’s Sinbad,” stated one unidentified source from the Taebo organization.


The Dan Akroyd of Black people